Danny (Part III)

Posted on May 7, 2012 by kencrest

Bullying in schools can lead to ongoing problems as our kids get older. Depression associated with bullying and victimization can lead to academic problems, self-defeating behaviors, and interpersonal problems (Seals and Young, 2003). Remember Danny’s challenges at school? His typical day included routine “battles” with the environment (e.g., smells, noise) and with teachers and peers. This happens far too often to children with autism. Here are some helpful strategies to make our schools safe for everyone.
•Talk to your students about bullying (set the tone from the first day of class).
•Hang anti-bullying banners and posters.
•Have the students sign anti-bullying agreement and hang it in the classroom.
•Review anti-bullying rules and hang them in class.
•Conduct activities that promote class unity.
•Incorporate anti-bullying into your lesson plan.
•Class discussions teaching functional ways to prevent bullying.
•Adopt a zero tolerance stance and respond immediately to early signs of bullying (e.g., teasing, name calling).
•Have assigned seating and change if necessary.
•Be consistent.
•Get parents involved.

Stay away from bullies.
Tell someone.
Avoid bad situations.
Make friends.
Project confidence.
OUT BULLYING!

Source: http://www.bullyfree.com/resources/teachers.php

Resources:
Seals, D., & Young, J. (2003). Bullying and victimization: Prevalence and relationship to gender, grade level, ethnicity, self esteem, and depression. Adolescence, 38, 735-747.

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Danny (Part II)

Posted on April 16, 2012 by kencrest

There are different types of bullying, but regardless of the type, there is always a victim. Individuals with autism often have difficulties understanding another person’s perspective, making them a prime target for bullies.
Physical
•Hitting, Kicking, Pushing
•Stealing, Hiding or Destroying someone’s belongings
Verbal
•Name calling
•Insulting, Spreading false rumors
•Teasing, Threatening
•Derogatory comments
•Making the person feel left out or rejected
Cyber bullying
•Occurs via the Internet, Facebook, Twitter, and/or the cell phone

Research indicates the following:
•Children with disabilities are two to three times more likely to be bullied than their non-disabled peers
•47% of families participating in a 2009 survey reported their children had been hit by peers or siblings
•50% reported their children were scared by their peers
•12% of the families reported their child had never been invited to a birthday party
•9% were attacked and hurt in their private parts
•6% were almost always picked last for teams
•3% ate alone at lunch every day

Some of the reasons “Danny” got bullied are consistent with many kids diagnosed with autism. They are easily upset and get anxious throughout their daily routines. They are usually alone and don’t have many friends, making them an easy target for bullies. Like “Danny,” children on the spectrum have little confidence and lack the ability to stand up for themselves. Often times, children who are bullied will experience low self-esteem and depression into their adult years. Children who are bullied at school will look at school as an unsafe place and become more likely to have a higher rate of absenteeism.
In future weeks, the focus will be on strategies for parents and teachers, offering different ideas on preventing bullying in the community and at school.

Resources:
Carter, S. Bullying of Students with Asperger Syndrome. Issues in Comprehensive Pediatric Nursing. 09/2009; 32(3): 145-54.
Perkins, D. F., (2001). Bullying In Our Schools (ppt). Associate Professor of Family and Youth Resiliency and Policy. The Pennsylvania State University.
www.autismsafety.org

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Danny- A Day in the Life of a Boy with Autism

Posted on April 2, 2012 by kencrest

This is a story of a typical “day in the life” of a young boy who is diagnosed with autism. His name and age have been changed to protect his anonymity. KenCrest is writing a series on bullying. In addition to Danny’s story, there will be follow-up blogs with strategies for parents and teachers to prevent bullying in their neighborhoods and schools.

Hi! My name is Danny and I’m 14 years old. I woke up this morning and I could hear my mom making breakfast. Usually, I have French toast sticks, my favorite. But sometimes my mom tries to get me to eat other things besides my favorites. I love French toast sticks, chicken nuggets and fries from McDonald’s; why do I have to eat anything else? That’s what I like. When she makes me eat other things, I always get upset and have a bad day. Then my mom has a bad day. Why does she do that to herself? Oh good, French toast sticks. It’s going to be a good day.

After I eat my breakfast and go through my routine, it’s the same everyday; I get ready for my first battle. I hate the bus. Why can’t my mom drive me? Oh yeah, I have to “try and do new things” and “I have to learn to be independent” is what they talked about at my ISP. When I ride on the bus, I always get picked on by Hank, a bully who lives on my street. He looks at me weird and makes faces at me. The last time it rained, he knocked my books out of my hands and they landed in a puddle. Everyone laughed. I hate him and I hate riding the bus because he’s on it.

When I make it to school, I’m usually angry and sad at the same time. I don’t have any friends. No one talks to me at school. I think I look the same but I know I act different. It’s this autism thing everyone talks about. I don’t like that either. Usually my morning classes are fun because I share things that no one else knows. I’m pretty sure I’m the smartest person in my class. My teacher doesn’t even know some of the things I know about dinosaurs and the insects in our world. But once that fun is over, I have to get ready for my next battle…lunch.

Oh good, mom packed chicken nuggets. If I can avoid Hank and his friends, I might have a quiet lunch. I don’t know why no one sits with me…oh yeah…autism. I don’t think I’m that different at lunch. It’s only when Hank picks on me that I look different. Maybe it’s the way I yell and jump around or throw things when I get angry that makes me look different from other 7th graders. Just when I thought I made it through lunch, as I was leaving the cafeteria, my ears started to hurt. “FREAK! YOU FREAK!” Yep, it was Hank and two of his friends. Why do other kids laugh at that? It’s not funny. I covered my ears and started to run back to class. Today, I hated lunch.

The afternoon was going okay until I was reminded that today was “Day 6.” That meant I have gym class at the end of my day. At least I don’t have to change clothes for gym anymore. Since my mom wrote that note telling the school that certain smells bother me, I don’t even go into the locker room. But I look different since I’m the only person not wearing gym clothes. Maybe that’s why I’m always the last to get picked for a team. Today we’re playing basketball. No one ever throws me the ball. Why do I have to do this? When the teacher saw me walking during the game, she yelled at me. Great! Now the teacher’s yelling at me and people are laughing. I hate gym class.

The ride home on the bus wasn’t so bad. Hank stayed late because he got in trouble for picking on me at lunch. Once I made it home, I saw the McDonald’s bag and I could smell the fries. “How was your day honey,” my mom asked. “The usual,” I said. That’s what I always tell her.

About the author: Dan Thrash, M.A. has been working for KenCrest for 20 years. He has been working with people with autism for over 30 years. He is the father of three sons and a professor of Special Education.

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A Reflection on One God-One Call

Posted on November 23, 2011 by kencrest

This is a concluding blog reflecting on the Lutheran Services in America-Disability Network Conference, One God-One Call, held in Philadelphia October 4-6.

At the beginning of October I attended and participated in a conference dealing with the spiritual needs of people living with disabilities. This was the first LSA-DN conference on the East Coast. Thankfully KenCrest saw the importance of this area of a person’s life and supported this conference in many ways.

There were many fine speakers, some of our own presented and one of our consumers participated in devotions with our Lutheran synod bishop. One thing I came away with is the need for churches to know what we do in order to know what we have to offer. As a church-based organization, there is a need for partnership with churches, places where people express there spirituality.

As a pastor myself, I know what a fishbowl of issues that confront the members of places of worship and that a spiritual leader is not equipped to handle them all. As I work in all different areas at KenCrest, I am reminded of what valuable resources there are in the staff and consumers we serve. The church and social ministry organizations are always running up against financial concerns, but in forming partnerships in which we can share what we have, I believe God will bless it.

I know some of these partnerships have been happening and new ones are being formed. This conference challenges me to be looking for these opportunities that God puts before me as I work in both arenas. I am thankful for being able to assist with this conference and to have allowed one of our consumers to participate also.

Rev. Bruce J. Thorsen, ELCA Pastor, Minister of Music at Lutheran Church of the Resurrection, Yardley, PA, Behavioral/Sexual Consultant for KenCrest Consultants.

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One God, One Call—Celebrating Inclusion and Hope

Posted on October 19, 2011 by kencrest

This blog is the first in a series following the Lutheran Services in America-Disability Network conference One God, One Call, held October 4-6 in Philadelphia. Our guest bloggers reflect on their conference experiences. Pictured here is The Chris Burke Band.

By Kristin Vought

Then some people came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. And when they could not bring him to Jesus because of the crowd, they removed the roof above him; and after having dug through it, they let down the mat on which the paralytic lay. Mark 2:3-4

As an ELCA missionary in England, I served as a counselor for a week at a camp for children with autism. I remember telling this story from the Gospel of Mark, and receiving the following questions: “Why can’t the man get to Jesus?” “Why can’t the people make room?” “Can’t we bring Jesus to the man?”

The One God, One Call 2011 Conference in Philadelphia, October 2-4, addressed these questions, and elevated the need for collaboration between congregations, special ministries, advocates and caregivers on issues for inclusive ministries with people with intellectual and developmental disabilities.

Celebrating inclusion and hope, advocate and musician Chris Burke with Joe and John DeMasi kicked off the conference with powerful and uplifting messages. Throughout the three-day event, participants from 13 states joined sessions on various topics including tools for reaching the deaf in communities, understanding mental illness, addressing the spiritual needs in families and congregations, promoting caregiver wellness, faith through action, and more.

Just as the men broke through the roof to include the paralyzed man, we too must break down barriers in our own communities of faith, remembering that people have very different abilities, and to recognize and rejoice in the gifts of all God’s children. Through One God, we are all created in God’s image just as God wants us to be. And together, as partners and ministers of Christ, we can live out One Call.

Kristin Vought is a graduate Intern at Lutheran Services in America and a student in the Masters of Arts in Public Leadership Program, Lutheran Theological Seminary at Philadelphia.

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Love Is Something If You Give It Away

Posted on September 23, 2011 by kencrest


This is the fourth blog anticipating the One God, One Call Conference http://www.lutheranservices.org/onepeopletogether to be held in Philadelphia, October 4-6.

Growing up this was the chorus of a song I often sang at various youth events

Love is something if you give it away

Give it away, Give it away.

Love is something if you give it away

You’ll end up having more.

Periodically I have wondered how this could be true – giving love away and ending up having more. However, I have found that remembering to love is the key; whether that be people in my biological family, or people who really don’t like me, or jealous colleagues or people who are most different from me. I have learned to put love out front and lock judgment away in a safe place. We are all called to love with no further qualifications. We have no responsibility being judgmental about anything.

Let Love lead the way! We all know people who are different from us for whatever reasons. The reasons don’t matter, so why does the fact that they are different stand in our way? We all know people who are different from us in our work sites or congregations or even our families who say or do things that annoy us and maybe even make us mad. Wouldn’t our lives on this earth be totally different and potentially be less stressful if we Let Love lead the way? I hope you might Let Love lead the way for you knowing that Love IS something if you give it away – You WILL end up having more.

Please share the information about the One God, One Call Conference http://www.lutheranservices.org/onepeopletogether October 4-6 at the Sheraton University City in Philadelphia with everyone you know. Encourage people you know to register. Remember to register yourself, bring people from your family, your workplace, your congregation, and your community.

Be bold enough to Let Love lead the way without judgment. This will be an excellent conference, right in our neighborhood and will definitely remind us that Love IS something if you give it away – YOU WILL END UP HAVING MORE!

Here’s how guest blogger Susan Pursch describes herself: “I am a child of God who has learned to love through life experiences, some positive and some challenging, as that was not always easy to find in my family. Learning about love and sharing it was another challenge. Once I owned the fact that I was loved and that I was lovable the rest fell into place. May love abound in me AND YOU!”

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We the People…with Opportunities

Posted on August 24, 2011 by kencrest

When Carl Baust was a young fella, his dad was scoutmaster at St. John Lutheran Church in Hatboro, PA.  The long-time scouting leader gave his son and a few of his friends an opportunity, a chance to succeed as Boy Scouts.  Henry Baust knew that these young men, who with developmental disabilities, would make the most of their scouting experience, and indeed they did.

Faithful to their troop, they participated in typical scouting activities as well as some specially tailored to them.  Among the more adventurous was a camping trip with another troop.  Like me, Carl is afraid of heights. He hesitated to cross a suspended bridge on the trail.  Don’t worry, other scouts assured him, we’ll help.  One got in front of Carl, another behind, encouraging him and telling him to keep looking straight ahead.  That was quite a few years ago, but Carl still takes pride in making it across that bridge. 

The years have passed, and the troop still exists.  Carl is now 50. Henry, Carl’s father, has died.  Another enterprising scoutmaster Alan Eickhoff took over leadership.

And here’s the best part, so great is this special troop,  that last year all five members became Eagle Scouts, an accomplishment covered by local media outlets and acknowledged in congratulatory letters from Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and Barack Obama.  Carl carries in his backpack a collection of 20 or so photos of the award ceremony and a notebook of those letters.

Like a good scout Carl is prepared with photos, letters and, yes, other essentials like a rain jacket and umbrella.  And he has made the most of the opportunities his father offered through Boy Scouts so many years ago.

–Paula Kadel didn’t have opportunity to be a Girl Scout ,but “I appreciate scouting’s very positive impact on so many young people’s lives.”  She is manager, marketing and communication at KenCrest and is assisting with the Lutheran Services in America-Disability Network conference, One God, One Call, October 4-6 in Philadelphia.  Learn more here. http://www.lutheranservices.org/onepeopletogether

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One God, One Call: One People Together; Blog II

Posted on August 10, 2011 by kencrest

In this second blog in this series anticipates One God, One Call, the Lutheran Services in America-Disability Network Conference to be held in Philadelphia, October 4-6.  For more information: http://www.lutheranservices.org/onepeopletogether. 

When I was first diagnosed with late stage cancer more than twenty years ago, John, a man I knew from church, came to visit. His young wife had just died of cancer. He told me that the most important thing I could do was to learn to be a gracious care receiver. He regretted that his wife had struggled so with accepting help. She was fiercely independent and fought against the need to depend on others. He reflected that their experience could have been shared and many burdens lightened if only she had been willing to let others in. 

No one, and I mean no one, can get through this life without depending on other people.  To think otherwise is a dangerous delusion. We are called into community and we need each other. I’ve certainly learned that in my life — over and over.

That means we each need to reach out and help others. But maybe more importantly, we need to figure out how to be the ones who receive the help. That is far, far harder than being the caregivers. I think about how hard each of us resists “being a burden”, “needing someone else”, “being dependent on another person for anything”. We fight that so hard. What, then, are we saying about what it means to be the receiver of another person’s help? That somehow it is a demeaning role? A role that is less valued? A role that robs us of our pride and denies our selfhood?

Does it have to be that way? We really do need one another – whether it is for a jump when our car battery is dead or to be dressed and toileted when we are too frail to do that for ourselves.

We see self-reliance as a virtue, but place no virtue on mutual reliance (as distinct from freeloading or inappropriate dependence). I think it’s time to try to right that balance. We need to be willing to elevate the role of care receiver and to learn to be gracious in that role ourselves. What would it take for that to happen? How can we practice that regularly? Would we have to deal with our finitude and our utter reliance on others and on God?  I’d love to see us have a serious conversation about this…let me know what you think….

–Written by: Jill Schumann; president and CEO of Lutheran Services in America. LSA is working to create a movement of hope and grace toward a society that values generosity, inclusion, justice and mutual care.

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One God, One Call: One People Together: We The People

Posted on July 27, 2011 by kencrest

KenCrest is proud to be a sponsor of, One God, One Call:  One People Together, to be held in Philadelphia, Oct 4-6, 2011.  The Lutheran Services in America – Disability Network will generate guests from many states to experience what the birthplace of our nation has to offer.

This is the first of six blogs that will begin to address the event.  I have asked others to join in this blog series and hope you will both enjoy and engage in the discussion.

We The People – First President Washington and I might have gotten along quite well.  If Geprge had a chance to visit my office he would see that I honor the founders with a framed reproduction of the Constitution of the United States.  Near that impressive document is a reproduction of a fond hometown memory, the Statue of Liberty.  Both symbols are extremely important to people with disabilities.

Freedom, Liberty, Justice and who should be allowed to vote, were heavily debated in a hot and muggy room sealed to public scrutiny.  Throw in Divine Guidance and our founders had a difficult four months of debate that resulted in the governing document of our Nation.  At the end they recognized that their document and fledgling agreement was far from perfect.  Their debate could have continued – as ours does today.

People with disabilities seek to be part of that debate.  Benefactors to be sure of the freedoms that our Constitution and bylaws guarantee, but also co-creators of the “more perfect union” its preamble acknowledges. 

Opportunity brings ability to life!  Who knows what abilities may result from your opportunity to travel to the site of our Nation’s roots. Philadelphia will open its Constitution Hall doors in October, come join us – We The People.

–Written by Bill Nolan, Executive Director of KenCrest Centers

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V.I.P. Treatment for a Very Important Phillies Fan

Posted on July 14, 2011 by kencrest

                It had been a rainy morning and I can admit that the gloom put a damper on my chirpy attitude but I put a giddy-up in my voice when the phone rang.

                “Good morning, Community Living, this is Kelsey. How can I help you?”

                “Hey Kelsey, this is Ryan from the Phillies Community Outreach. I’ve got some good news for you and Tommy…”

                And suddenly my fake smile turned into a giant, Cheshire cat grin.

                About a month or two prior to this phone call I had written a few letters (snail mail letters, two faxes, and a certified letter to be exact) about a KenCrest supported individual expressing how truly wonderful he is and that if anyone deserved to meet his favorite baseball star, it would be this 10 year old boy. I know that calling in a favor like that from a professional sports team will be over looked 1 out of 5,345,799 times but I’m a persistent, if not annoying, person when it comes to something I feel passionately about. This phone call meant that my persistence (obnoxiousness) paid off. With this phone call came an invitation for Tommy and three guests to go to a Phillies game. Icing to the cake? We get to take a V.I.P. tour of the stadium, hang out on the field during batting practice, AND sit next to the press box.

                After our elevator ride to the tunnels of the stadium and before we got to take pictures with the World Series trophies, we stood behind home plate and watched the Phillies heavy hitters getting their warm-up hits in (Jayson Werth and Raul Ibanez to name a couple and I did that for bragging and name dropping purposes only). Tommy was in absolute awe and could hardly form words with all of his excitement when a Phillies representative came over to him and asked who his favorite player was, naturally he said Ryan Howard. As practice was ending and the players were going back to the locker room, I stood by the dugout to snap a few last minute pictures. By the time I turned around, Ryan Howard and Jimmy Rollins had walked up to Tommy and they were signing his baseball. They spent a few minutes joking with him and posing for pictures. And that’s the moment a dream had come true.

                We stayed at the stadium for a few innings of the game but it was getting late and Tommy’s excitement had turned into exhaustion. Regardless of his fatigue, Tommy chatted the entire ride home from the stadium about how great Ryan and Jimmy were, how they joked about the weather and that they were now his buddies. He told the story at least a dozen times and each time with more joy. I could feel my emotions welling up and did my best to keep myself together in front of Tommy. By the time I climbed into my car, the tears were flowing.  I was overwhelmed that Tommy had such an incredible experience and that I could be a part of it.

                For those of us who don’t work direct care here at KenCrest, I can understand how easy it is to lose sight of what our work stands for behind mounds of paperwork, fast approaching deadlines and endless meetings. I feel that I was asked to write this blog to show that little movements cause big waves within this agency and if you feel a certain way, do something about it. I felt that someone deserved a dream to come true and by the guise of KenCrest, I was able to make it happen.  It just goes to show that the extra efforts we put into our workdays mean the world to the people we support. 

*Name has been changed to protect the identity of the child we serve.

– Written by Kelsey Magaskie, Administrative Assistant

Kelsey is working on saving the world one blog at a time. Help her save the world by leaving comments below thanking someone for a time they went an extra mile for you.

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